Russian transgender politician reverses decision to detransition, saying she was acting ‘out of fear’

Russia’s first and only openly transgender politician has said she is no longer detransitioning, telling CNN that she had been previously driven by fear of Russia’s ban on gender reassignment.

Alyoshina said she is now “ashamed” of posts she made earlier this year announcing the move.

“I wrote and said this out of fear because gender reassignment and the non-existent LGBTQ+ movement are prohibited in the Russian Federation,” she said, adding: “I was born a woman in a man’s body.”

Alyoshina transitioned from male to female in 2020, changing both her name and gender marker in her passport. “It was my sincere desire,” she told CNN. “I had been fighting for this for many years and underwent multiple psychiatric examinations.”

Then, in May, Alyoshina changed her Telegram channel back to her pre-transition name and uploaded a pre-transition profile photo, saying she had decided to revert to her birth gender during Orthodox Lent, citing “spiritual anguish.”

In a now-deleted post, Alyoshina also apologized to the Russian people, indicating a patriotic motive for her decision to remain in Russia. “I am a patriot of my country, that’s why I live in Russia,” Alyoshina said. Asked to clarify the move at the time, she told CNN, “I cannot give more detailed comments,” adding she did not feel safe to speak about it while still in Russia.

On Wednesday, she explained to CNN that the move was prompted by her fear of persecution after appealing to the Russian Supreme Court in early 2024. Alyoshina filed an official request to the court in January seeking clarification on new legal restrictions, her status as a transgender person, potential extremist labeling for online publications and her ability to engage in public activities.

When the court responded that it doesn’t provide explanations on current laws, she said she felt terrified that “the state repressive machine could turn on.”

“I began sleeping poorly and waking up early, by springtime my anxiety and depression worsened,” Alyoshina said. The politician also feared that she might never achieve her life’s dream of undergoing gender reassignment surgery due to the new regulations.

Unable to leave the country, Alyoshina told CNN she still does not feel safe but explained the need to come forward with the statement to stay true to herself. “I’m just tired of playing someone else’s role. I’m tired of pretending to be a man,” she said.

She also remains vocal about the challenges faced by the LGBTQ+ community in present-day Russia, saying their rights are discriminated against and violated. “I hope my post will provide moral support to transgender people,” she said adding that it is currently impossible for a transgender person to change the documents even after an official medical diagnosis confirming their gender identity.

President Vladimir Putin signed a widely criticized law in July 2023 prohibiting nearly all medical help for transgender people including gender reassignment surgery, except for treating “birth anomalies” in children.

The legislation also bars transgender individuals from adopting children and allows authorities to annul their marriages.

This move, along with stringent laws passed in December 2022 targeting so-called “LGBTQ propaganda,” is viewed as part of Russia’s broader policy to enforce what it refers to as “traditional values” and suppress LGBTQ+ rights. These policies have been widely criticized by human rights organizations and have significantly impacted the lives of LGBTQ+ individuals in the country, leading to increased fears, marginalization and a climate of oppression.

In October 2022, when the State Duma passed the first reading of the anti-LGBTQ+ bill, Alyoshina decided to resign as regional head of the centrist, liberal-democratic Civic Initiative party and end her political career.

“I have no idea how to continue to conduct public political activity as an openly transgender woman,” she said in a Telegram post at the time. However, in 2023, Alyoshina returned and announced her plans to run for governor in the Altai region of Siberia, before later dropping that campaign.

Interviewed by CNN during the final stages of the law’s approval process in late 2022, Alyoshina criticized the new legislation, characterizing it as “just another brick in building an autocracy in Russia.” Alyoshina said she had been discriminated against as a transgender politician on numerous occasions but added the law would complicate further the already difficult life of all LGBTQ+ people in Russia.

A study carried out in 2021 by Russia’s transgender support group, T-Action, estimated at least 30,000 transgender people have sought medical treatment or changed their legal documents. However, the actual number is likely much higher, despite an increased number of transgender individuals fleeing the country, the group’s coordinator, Anton Macintosh, told CNN. “Understandably, the majority stayed. It is not so easy to leave, especially for a transgender person,” he said.

When asked what Alyoshina was hoping to achieve for other transgender people in Russia by coming forward with this statement, she replied: “I would like to convey the message: Don’t give up, keep fighting. As long as we keep fighting, we are alive.”